


somewhere close to breaking

by WaveGoodbye



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Earp sister moments, F/F, Gen, WynHaught brotp, Wynonna's super healthy coping mechanisms after Alice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-12-23 19:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11996328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaveGoodbye/pseuds/WaveGoodbye
Summary: 'A motorcycle roared through the almost empty streets, its deep, fast rumble cutting through the quiet of the evening. The speed and sound unsettled everything within close range and, well, that was exactly the point. It was one of the only things that brought any kind of relief to Wynonna Earp these days.'A telling of Wynonna's totally healthy coping mechanisms following the departure of Alice. The only person who had ever gotten through to her had always been Waverly, and now an actual cop who she didn't entirely hate. At all. Wynonna only hated herself and anyone who had brought that damn curse upon her.





	somewhere close to breaking

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own anything to do with Wynonna Earp, I just really love these three women (and a Dolls) so much? 
> 
> This wouldn't leave my head until it was written. 
> 
> Enjoy!

A motorcycle roared through the almost empty streets, its deep, fast rumble cutting through the quiet of the evening. The speed and sound unsettled everything within close range and, well, that was exactly the point. It was one of the only things that brought any kind of relief to Wynonna Earp these days.

 

She gripped the handles tighter and took her eyes off the road ahead, turning to see who had been trailing her for the past few minutes. They narrowed once she saw the familiar cruiser. She'd shook them off a while ago and Wynonna thought that'd been the end of it but no, that damn car with that damn cop kept coming back for more.

 

Nicole checked her rearview mirror to see a thankfully empty street behind her. Wynonna was dangerous on that thing at the best of times, nevermind in the state she'd been in for the past couple of months. Nicole's foot pressed harder on the gas and began to close some of the gap between them, her heart thumping in her chest. She loved the adrenaline rush the job gave her, and no she didn't exactly despise high speed chases with idiots but she also wasn't a huge fan when they involved her girlfriend's sister.

 

Nothing had been the same since Alice left.

 

She'd barely even been there, but her departure turned all of their lives upside down and Wynonna hadn't been the same since. She had been so worryingly detached most of the time that the group had taken to a private meeting at the homestead which ended up with all of them agreeing on Jeremy placing a tracker on Wynonna's bike.

 

"She'll kill me," Jeremy had fretted. He'd been entirely serious.

 

"Or she'll kill herself," Waverly countered after the second time she'd had to watch Wynonna sneak in through the house in the early hours of the day, bloodied and bruised from whatever fight she'd gotten herself into.

 

After the last time her own privacy was invaded, the decision to take some of Wynonna's away hadn't come easily to Waverly, but protecting her sister had. Always would. She'd already lost Wynonna once, she wasn't letting it happen again. Whatever it took.

 

Nicole glanced to her speedometer and puffed out a breath as she chased after the heir, tyres squealing as she rounded a corner. God help her if she came off that bike. Foot to the floor, the cruiser closed in and Nicole swerved to the right, her passenger window down.

"Earp!"

 

The back wheel lifted from the road surface as Wynonna came to a sudden halt while Nicole's car continued to speed forward. She knew those streets like the back of her hand and she'd never had the law get the better of her before, she wasn't about to let that change now. Not when she was having so much fun. The bike bounced down heavily and she grunted against the weight before turning to the left and disappearing down a narrow alley like a bat out of hell.

 

A phone call came through the car's system, interrupting the string of curse words leaving her mouth, and Nicole glanced at the caller ID as she roughly pulled into reverse. She fumbled to answer it and twisted around swiftly, grabbing the back of the passenger seat as she backed up down the street.

 

"Hey, baby! Sorry to be blunt but it's not a great time to talk," Nicole blurted.

 

"What's wrong?"

 

Nicole could picture the concerned expression on Waverly's face perfectly. "Oh, nothin', just playing a game of cat and mouse with your sister." Nicole grinned humorlessly, worried for Wynonna as well. "Ah, she's winning!"

 

"She said she was looking into a case with Dolls! Where are you?"

 

The yellow marker on her sat nav was getting further away and Nicole checked around before she swung her cruiser out into another street, throwing the car into drive. "Babe, I got it. I'll talk to her, okay?"

 

"No!" Waverly dismissed. "I'm coming. She thinks my interventions have been, quote, 'irritating to her core' but if she thinks that was annoying, wait until I see her."

 

It came from a good place, but it would end up with Waverly screaming and crying and Wynonna standing there taking it, outwardly unaffected with whatever flew out of her sister's mouth. Nicole couldn't watch that again. Her back pressed further against the seat as she accelerated quickly, tyres squealing against the asphalt.

 

"I'm really not sure—”

 

"I'm in my car, where are you?"

 

Nicole groaned internally. She winced. "You're breaking up, Waves."

 

"We will be if you don't cut that shit!" came Waverly's reply.

 

She wasn't always cute when she was mad. No, sometimes she was downright terrifying, but Nicole managed a wry smile. "Whaaa-aaat?"

 

"You know what!"

 

Wynonna wasn't far. It looked like she was headed to the old key factory in town that hadn't been open in thirty years. Nicole would be there in a few minutes if she wasn't distracted. Wynonna had been there three times in a week according to Jeremy's tracker.

 

"Hey, um, remember when I blew myself up for you and your sister? Yeah? I've got her, I promise."

 

"Hey, um," Waverly mocked. "Remember how—"

 

"Baby, you know how much I enjoy fighting with you like this, but maybe we can save this for later? You know, when I'm done simultaneously supporting your sister and kicking her ass. 'Kay?" She ended the call before Waverly could respond and she hoped the stink eye she'd surely be on the receiving end later wouldn't be too cutting. "Always you Earp women..."

  
  


i.

  
  


As it turned out, Nicole found Wynonna's bike just under a mile out parked up out front of the abandoned factory. Jeremy had told her and Dolls last week that it'd become a semi-frequent place for Wynonna to visit. She was never there long and they all had a dozen other more pressing things to do, like actual work and cases and relationships, and all of the other times had Wynonna return home safe, so it wasn't pressing.

 

Not apparently until Wynonna had spent the last thirty minutes doing her utmost to evade Nicole, including breaking every speed limit. She was well within her rights to arrest her and take her to a cell for the night. Not that she would. Wynonna needed a lot of things, but not that.

 

Nicole exited the cruiser and checked her surroundings cautiously. Wynonna was here, sure, but what else? Her breath puffed out in a cloud and the ground made a light crunch as she moved forward until she reached the nearest side access door. It was steel and the padlocks had long been cut away despite how many times they were replaced. It was downright freezing to the touch and she slinked her slim body through the gap as soon as she possibly could.

 

Her flashlight illuminated what the darkening sky had begun to conceal, gun held firmly and outright. This part of her job she would never get used to. She was always nervous, scared. But she was a cop and Wynonna was... family. And she would be damned if anything happened to her on her watch. Not even because of Waverly.

 

Nicole carefully and methodically cleared the main lower section of the factory to no avail. She hadn't found any sign of Wynonna but she also hadn't heard a peep from anything else either. Shorty's wouldn't serve Wynonna these days, mainly due to it being closed since Alice had left. There was also that time Nedley had to awkwardly insist Wynonna take herself home and remind her that he was still sheriff of this town and technically he could take her in for breaking and entering. He assured her he understood her love for the place —happy hour was his favourite of the day, but the law was the law.

 

Her eyes followed the light from her torch, right up two large sets of flights where an office and a second production or design floor seemed to be. Nicole headed straight for it, keeping her feet light and quick.

 

She went inside the office first. It was large considering the factory wasn't too sizeable, a few desks lay turned over with filing cabinets, old chairs and big, boxy computers. Nicole shone her torch around all the corners of the room as she went. The whole place smelled damp and vaguely of stale weed. She stepped on something small and hard and looked down to a small plastic syringe. The needle had gotten nowhere close to going through her work boots but she still breathed out a relieved breath. She'd have to talk to Nedley about getting a patrol set up.

 

Nicole's heart sank. Wynonna was here.

 

She wouldn't... right?

 

Nicole heard rushed footsteps and straightened up to full height, gripping her weapon as she spun in the direction of the noise. Someone slammed into her, sending her flying back over a desk. She barely had time to roll and scramble back to her feet when someone tripped over her legs and fell down half atop her, smothering the light from the flashlight.

 

"God, you stupid bitch."

 

Granted, that statement could have come from many disgruntled criminals and citizens of Purgatory towards Nicole Haught, but that particular one had come from Wynonna's ever-graceful mouth.

 

Nicole panted heavily from the shock and pain. She shoved at Wynonna who had already begun to climb off her. "Hey!"

 

"Well..." Wynonna's eyes widened comically. "True. The hell you doing here, Haught? You're supposed to be with my sister, not stalking me."

 

"Me? What about you? And why were you trying to lose me on the road? You forget we know each other?"

 

Wynonna got to her feet and moved so she could see the door. Her eyes narrowed when something occurred to her. "If you've called Waverly, I swear we're done. This bromance will be deader than the Widows."

 

"Answer me."

 

"I like space and you were invading it."

 

"Nice try," Nicole replied, holstering her gun once she was back on her feet.

 

"Look, I know you have other shit going on. You don't have to be here babysitting. In fact... I'd prefer it if you weren't," Wynonna shrugged and her tongue clicked. "You know, in case my warm welcome was some sort of mixed signal."

 

"I don't know, a girl throwing herself at me... some might say you are giving me mixed signals." Nicole wondered if she could call Dolls. Waverly would be emotional and she had zero doubts they'd come to blows with neither coming out on top. At least Wynonna listened to Dolls. Sure, he never said much but whenever he did... whatever it was, it usually worked. Except her phone was in the car. She could radio in but her shift had ended an hour ago and the Earps didn't need any extra attention than they already had from the town. She saw the tension rising in Wynonna and softened. "Are you okay?" she asked quietly.

 

It was stupid. Obviously she wasn't okay. How could she be.

 

Wynonna recoiled. "Okay, you know what, out. Go. Before I throw your ass out a window."

 

"I've seen the needle in here. If you're shooting up, I'll kick your ass to hell, girl. What are you doing here? Huh? Got some new business plans rollin' around? Looking to restore an old town's—"

 

"That's rich as fuck," Wynonna laughed.

 

Nicole shrugged. Her eyes had adjusted to the level of light pouring in the room. It wasn't a bright beam from her flashlight but the security lights from a neighbouring factory provided enough to see. "Tell me I'm way off base."

 

"Think you've bit the bullet one too many times, Haught. It's turned you soft."

 

"Look, I can't—I can't imagine what you're going through," she began, going as far as to touch Wynonna's shoulder. "But if you need to talk, like to a professional, nobody will judge you for it." Her touch was rejected with force.

 

Wynonna snorted, her smile brilliant and wide. She sobered, eyes steeling. For a long moment she simply glared, and then she swallowed past the lump in her throat. "Right. 'What are you feeling right now, Ms Earp? What's going on in your life? How's your relationship with your parents? How was your childhood?’" Her face scrunched to resemble awkward embarrassment. "Ah well, ya see, Doc, everything that's ever gone wrong in my life can be directly related back to a curse put upon my family when Wyatt— yes  _ the _ Wyatt Earp killed a demon posing as the town sheriff. Oh, and I gave my baby away recently so that the revenants still living here wouldn't try to sacrifice her every chance they could get." Talking about Alice... thinking about her... Wynonna wanted to punch something. Now.

 

Nicole looked so goddamn sympathetic it turned Wynonna's stomach. The following apology just made it worse. She knew Nicole was sorry. She knew she was only trying to help, even after she'd thrown it back in her face more times than she could count. But Wynonna needed a way to channel the pain, and all Nicole seemed to be offering was a lecture. All everyone offered lately was a damn lecture. Even Doc had tried.

 

Waverly had been the worst. Jesus, that girl was insufferable when she wanted to be. She spat home truths out when Wynonna definitely didn't want to hear them, made too much sense and was always so unwaveringly supportive that it usually made her chest constrict and she'd end up doing something stupid like crying, sobbing against her like it would change a damn thing. Waverly would tell her how much she loved her and they'd break the curse and get their baby back, and Wynonna would always cry and nod, believing it for just a second.

 

It never lasted. She would always push Waverly away and resent her whenever the sun rose.

 

"Why can't you go back to being cool?" Wynonna asked. "You bought me whiskey once a week and we got wasted in the barn. Why d'you have to ruin a good thing?"

 

Nicole remembered those few weeks. Specifically, the hangovers and the arguments with Waverly. After the second time she'd been accused of enabling Wynonna's self-destructive behaviour. Each of the group had, all of them allowing Wynonna to do whatever she pleased, when she pleased.

 

Nicole figured she was the booze and drunken confessions, Waverly was home; comfort and safety, someone Wynonna clung to when she was too drunk to pretend she wasn't falling apart, and Dolls was her rock. As far as Nicole knew, Dolls hadn't asked Wynonna anything like how was she feeling and he didn't push her to open up or offer anything she didn't want to give, but he was steadfast by her side. Always. Nicole saw the way his eyes searched for her in every room.

 

Jeremy unfortunately ended up being a verbal punching bag more often than not, and Doc had been MIA a lot. When he wasn't, things were strained between him and Wynonna. No bad blood by any means, but she couldn't look at him and he didn't know what else to do but stay away until she'd healed a little.

 

"I don't think booze is the answer anymore," Nicole said regretfully. "What you're looking for is not at the bottom of a bottle, trust me. You don't want to go down that road. Waverly will—"

 

"Oh, God, stop," Wynonna spat out at the sound of her sister's name. "Go. You shouldn't even be here. And don't even think about narcing. Waverly thinks I'm with Dolls looking into some case."

 

Not entirely true. "Yeah, ‘cause lying to my girlfriend really works out well for me." Nicole softened when the hardness to Wynonna's eyes fall away, probably at the memory of the moment they shared at the hospital several months ago. "We're all here for you, Earp, but you gotta let us in. Think things through before you pull a disappearing act. You know Waverly jumps to conclusions when you go all radio silence. She thinks the worst, and it kills her. Especially when you're out on a witch hunt without backup. Waverly would kill you if you got hurt again, and then Dolls, me..."

 

"Waverly looks at me like I'm  _ damaged  _ now. You know how much that gets me? The way it makes my fuckin' skin crawl?" Tears stung her eyes and her throat was tight. She almost missed the sound of the whole reason she was in an abandoned factory on a Wednesday evening when she could be literally anywhere else in the world.

 

Except she didn't. She heard it loud and clear, blindly feeling for Peacemaker by her side. They had company. Nicole missed it, too focused on her friend.

 

"And you know what, Haught," Wynonna added, "it's a whole lot like the one you're giving me now, so why don't you take a walk and let me deal with this shit the only way I know."

 

"I'm not going anywhere."

 

"Yeah, that wasn't so much a request."

 

Nicole bristled but stood her ground. "You want me out of here, come with. You want your sister to stop worrying about you? Talk to her or me, or anyone. Someone. Nobody's going to judge you."

 

"I am talking, Nicole. You're not listening."

 

"And you are? Am I supposed to leave you here in this dump to get into God knows what?"

 

"That's pretty much the plan," Wynonna confirmed. "Sick, right?"

 

Nicole knew she had lost her. Nothing good was looking to come out of the night. "You know, you're looking kinda wasted," she lied. "And you're verging on being disorderly."

 

Wynonna smiled nastily. "Think you're getting me in cuffs,  _ officer _ ? Think you're relevant and can pull rank on me just 'cause you're screwing my sister?" She snorted and whistled at the instant reaction she got. Thankfully Nicole was easy. She should be out of there in no time. "Look at you... all alone and delusional on cloud cuckoo land. You really are a puppy, aren't you? Those sad eyes. Aw, poor baby."

 

It wasn't like Wynonna even meant it. Her stomach twisted uncomfortably. But she could be like this with Nicole and knew nothing would change between them. Not even if she hurt her.

 

Nicole swallowed down a whole slew of words she wanted to throw back at Wynonna. She was in pain, and she'd make her apologise another time. "I'll come back for your bike," she said as she moved towards her. "But right now I'm taking you home whether you want to go or not, understood?" Nicole caught Wynonna's eyes dart away from her for a moment before they were back, fiery as ever.

 

"Don't think about touching me right now. I really don't have time for this, and neither do you. Go."

 

The warning was crystal clear, and of course Nicole ignored it entirely. Her hand had barely made contact with Wynonna's arm and while she expected some resistance, she hadn't anticipated the woman evading her to the point where she twisted out of her grasp and was behind her in a flash, her boot low against Nicole's back before she was forced away and onto her knees. Nicole heard the dull sound of a fist making contact with skin and wrenched her head up. Hair in her eyes or not, there was no mistaking those red eyes.    
  
Shit.    
  
He was tall, standing a little over six foot, average build, and his large hands gripped tightly around the tops of Wynonna’s arms. He smiled until Wynonna drew her head back and slammed it against his mouth so hard she sent herself momentarily dizzy. Damn, she would be feeling that one in the morning. Her hand touched her head and came back with a trickle of blood. That bastard’s teeth had cut her.   
  
Nicole scrambled to her feet and charged him, using all of her weight with the surprise of Wynonna’s attack to get some distance between them. They crashed to the ground together, tangled while he swung a muscled arm out, his large fist catching her face by surprise, then her abdomen, knocking the wind out of her. Nicole’s feet tried to find purchase on the floor, scrambling backwards enough to reach her weapon stuck in her belt. He was heavy, and he could really cause some damage if he wanted to. If not for the way Wynonna launched herself at him to help with the shift of weight, Nicole wasn’t sure if she’d have been able to reach down and grab her piece, flicking the safety off as she rolled over, holding the revenant down with Wynonna’s help and firing a bullet into his chest.    
  
Her body hurt, it was true. And she was  _ pissed _ .    
  
She watched with a sense of envy as Wynonna’s fists rained down on the fallen man, over and over until it was just wet thumps and blood covered the other woman’s knuckles.    
  
“Wynonna, come on,” Nicole pleaded, pulling on her shoulder. The envy turned to worry and, dare she say it, almost pity for the poor bastard who had gotten cursed and was ending his time on Earth with an almighty beating from the Earp heir. “Wynonna!”   
  
Wynonna panted and reached for Peacemaker, a dull ache wrapping around her hand once she tightened her hold and aimed it down at the revenant whose blood had poured from his nose, mouth, and even eyes, coating his chin crimson. He growled, grabbing her about the wrist when the barrel of Peacemaker lit up and Wynonna depressed the trigger, his head snapping back in a simultaneous reaction.    
  
Her body thrummed with adrenaline and then Nicole was by her side, pulling her up to her feet. 

 

Nicole backed them up several paces. Jesus, there was never a dull moment in Purgatory. “Another  _ friend  _ of yours?” she panted, relieved to get a genuine laugh in response.   
  
“Please, that fug douche nugget? I have taste, okay, even when I’m wasted.”    
  
Wynonna never told any of them to make their peace anymore.    
  
“Apologies to your eardrums,” she offered.    
  
“Hey, thanks for the warning on Rev guy,” Nicole remarked. “At no point could ya have given me a head’s up?”   
  
“I told you to take a walk, dude.”    
  
“Right, my bad.”   
  
Wynonna’s mouth was still twisted into a reluctant smile when, in the time it took to blink, Nicole’s eyes widened and her lips parted, halfway to drawing her weapon again. Wynonna barely had time to register the two new revenants of the room when a gun went off and the other woman cried out.    
  
Nicole’s gun clattered to the floor and Wynonna’s blood ran cold.    
  
If anything happened to her, Waverly would die. She would never forgive her, ever. Wynonna would never forgive herself.    
  
She raced forward as Nicole was grabbed, slammed against the closest wall, and Wynonna only took her eyes off her for a moment to put a bullet through whichever moron revenant had been in the process of rushing her. She put one between his eyes before he could even speak.    
  
“Hey!”    
  
The other revenant held tight to Nicole’s throat but his attention was redirected upon the shot ringing out and the bitch heir screaming at him. The strong knee slamming up between his legs caught him entirely by surprise and made his eyes water, a short but pained cry hollered out. Nicole was satisfied with the sound as she shoved him away.    
  
“Nicole, I know you’re not a fan of the peen but if you’re gonna try to make him bust a nut, you want it to sound a little more…” Wynonna lowered Peacemaker to his crotch and shot, exhaling heavily, content with the agonised wail reverberating off the walls, getting louder . “Like that.”

 

He fell to his knees, hands cupped between his legs. His eyes were screwed tightly shut, oblivious to Peacemaker aimed between them. 

 

Nicole slid down the wall, brows pinched together. It made Wynonna’s stomach bottom out.    
  
“Haught,” she started cautiously, “I know you’re a tall, dramatic lesbian, but get your ass up. It’s just a scratch.”   
  
God, Waverly was going to  _ kill  _ her.    
  
Nicole laughed as her fingers wrapped around her weapon lying on the floor. “Just gettin’ armed for any more surprises we got coming our way,” she said, a little out of breath. It’s true, it was just a scratch. Bullet had only skimmed her. Still, a flesh wound? Stung like a bitch.    
  
Oh, thank God.   
  
There weren’t. Wynonna had spotted the threesome last week and had been keeping tabs on them. She liked a challenge but she didn’t have a death wish. Not really. Not if she really had to choose. But a challenge? She longed for it. The rage gnawing away at her these days wasn’t eased any by a single rev. It’d been weeks since she’d managed to get more than two. She’d been planning a much more memorable slaughter to the demonic lambs than what had just transpired but it would do. They were still dead, and Nicole was alive, even if a little roughed up.    
  
Wynonna hung her head briefly. “You got some sort of immortality curse as well? What’s it gonna take to keep you out for the count, huh?”   
  
Nicole laughed. “I don’t even want to think…”   
  
There. Normality.    
  
Nicole couldn’t wait to tell Waverly.    
  
Well, she couldn’t wait to be vague about the events but over-emphasize that Wynonna was still there and eventually everything would be okay. Good news was easy to tell.    
  
Their short moment was shattered by a gunshot from the lower floor.    
  
They both tightened their hold of their weapons.    
  
“Wynonna! Nicole!”   
  
Waverly.    
  
Beautiful, kind, soft Waverly.    
  
“Guys!”   
  
She sounded very much the opposite of soft. How the hell had she found them? Nicole’s eyes narrowed. Jeremy. He folded like a house of cards whenever Waverly wanted something from him. Pathetic, she thought, as if she wasn’t exactly the same around her girlfriend.    
  
Wynonna’s shoulders dropped. She sighed, touching where the bullet had grazed Nicole’s side. “Look, before I’m crucified, I just want you to know I’m…”   
  
Nicole nodded. “I know.”   
  
“We don’t make a bad team, you know.”   
  
“I know that, too.”   
  
“Wynonna!” Waverly yelled, sounding closer. “Nicole!”   
  
“Gotta jet,” Wynonna rushed out, tucking Peacemaker back in its holster. She ignored a weak plea for her not to do this, and then she was gone; through the door where she came face to face with her sister. Her feet were rooted and she felt hot all over the longer Waverly’s eyes roamed over her for any sign of injury and stopped at her bloodied hands. Shame. Wynonna could have drowned in it.    
  
“Wynonna,” Waverly said. Her eyes shone and she opened her mouth as if to say something.    
  
“Cole’s fine, before you try shooting me with that thing.” Direct and to the point, then Wynonna brushed by her on the stairs, jogging down them. She could feel the way she was watched the whole way down.    
  
It was easier to breathe outside.    
  
  


  
i    
  
  


  
Waverly sat down beside Wynonna on the porch, a blanket draped around her shoulders. Wynonna stared ahead to the barn so she didn’t have to see the hurt on her sister's face or the way she knew her eyes would be shining. She was sick of being the cause of it.

 

“I hate you.”

 

There it was, finally. The words sliced through Wynonna like a bullet, searing the way she imagined a bullet from Peacemaker would feel. She coughed lightly against a long swallow of whiskey, sucking the taste from inside her mouth. No words came. She didn’t even try. Wynonna allowed Waverly to turn her chin, facing her. Her eyes were hot when she opened them and she wanted to die when she saw the heartache over Waverly’s face. She’d put that there.

 

Waverly’s voice came out thick. “That’s what you want to hear, right? It’d make it easier. That you paid me back. Hurt me so much that I...”

 

“For what?”

 

“Taking her away,” Waverly shrugged helplessly.

 

Eventually Wynonna understood. The memory of handing Alice over was quashed by another long pull of whiskey. She didn’t want to deal with any of this right now. She couldn’t. All she had done for two months was avoid all of this shit and here Waverly was, trying to talk things over like they hadn’t always been the most dysfunctional family in the country.

 

“But you... you talk to Nicole sometimes. You hang out with Dolls, you see Doc when he’s around. You even talk to Jeremy, even though you’re nasty most of the time. But me? You won’t even  _ look  _ at me.”

 

Waverly sounded so hurt and insecure and Wynonna felt a familiar self-hatred rise like bile. The kind reserved only for Waverly. She ducked her head. “I’m mean to Nicole too. Is she out there telling everyone  we’re making friendship bracelets or something? Girl's a liar. And Dolls, Doc? I’m mean to them too. I’m an asshole,” she laughed softly, self-deprecating. “Always will be.”

 

“Yeah, but you don’t hate them. You hate me.”

 

Wynonna’s heart broke. She whipped her head up, eyes narrowing. “I hate you for  _ thinking  _ that I hate you.”

 

“How could I not?” Waverly exclaimed, exasperated. “All you do is avoid me. You only let me be there for you when you’re blind drunk and then you push me away and forget it ever happened! You get hurt and you walk around like it’s not killing me that you won’t let me help you.”

 

Wynonna pushed the heel of a palm into her eye as if it might stop her from breaking down again. She whimpered, sounding  _ pathetic _ , and then she sounded angry. “Waverly!”    
  
“The least you could do is own it.”   
  
“I don’t hate you!” Waverly snorted indignantly at her. “I mean it, ya tiny, stupid marshmallow.” Wynonna shook her head. “Without you, I… I wouldn’t be here, okay? I’d have ran off to whichever corner of the world I felt like, maybe even be in a ditch somewhere. Probably be in a ditch somewhere. But I’m not, I’m  _ here _ , and I’m doing my best to work through my shit the only way I’ve ever known how. It’s never pretty, it’s never all that  _ healthy _ , but it’s the Wynonna Way, okay?” For the first time in weeks, when Waverly burst into tears, Wynonna found their hands together, knees pressed together. “So give me some space, right? You know, then don’t because sometimes I really don’t need it even if I say that I do.”   
  
Waverly nodded, then moved the blanket around so they both were covered, even if one of them had a leather jacket on to stave off the frigid air and wasn’t entirely necessary. Tension began to seep out of her body, and it felt like it’d sunk into her bones these past couple of months. The sheer relief was immense. She took the bottle off Wynonna and tipped it up, smoothly swallowing a mouthful.    
  
“You really think I would have handed her over to anyone else?” Wynonna asked after a while, enjoying being close like that.    
  
“What?”   
  
“Alice. That day… if anyone else—and I  _ do  _ mean anyone else had been there, I wouldn’t have been able to. Not a chance. Not even Doc.” It was the truth. Nobody but Waverly. That was part of what had killed her. Wynonna had always loved Waverly; adored, fussed and protected her any chance she got, and then Mama left, Daddy was dead, and Willa was gone. Until she wasn’t, but her mind had been warped, twisted to something not even remotely like the sister Wynonna remembered. She loved Waverly in a way she’d never loved Willa, and more like the way she’d been overwhelmed with unconditional love the second she laid eyes on her daughter. The way she’d rather tear her own heart out than ever be the reason something wanted to hurt her.    
  
The way she loved Waverly had reminded her way too much of something she’d been desperately trying to forget. Only thing was that she probably should have left Waverly as well, except she couldn’t. Not again. She felt so fucking selfish for that.

  
Waverly leaned her head against her sister’s shoulder. She understood. “We’re going to break the shit out of this curse, Wynonna.”   
  
“Hell yeah, we are.”   
  
“I love you.”   
  
Wynonna pressed a kiss to Waverly’s head, eyes closed. “Me too.”   
  
“And I’m sorry I’ve had a tracker on your bike for the past month.”   
  
“You did what, now?”   
  
Waverly glanced up sheepishly once she felt Wynonna move away. She lifted a shoulder. “It was Jeremy’s idea.”   
  
Everything was still different, and would always remain as such, but at the core of the curse for the first time ever was the most lethal combination of love and loyalty there had ever been, and they had people who loved each of them the same way. Bulshar and his herd of sheep, and whoever the hell else waiting for them would have their work cut out for them.   
  
Even if Jeremy was still strung up in front of the sheriff’s office by the time they attacked. 


End file.
